The Coi Fish

To be a little fish in a big pond, or a big fish in a little pond, are but one in the same.  

“Different strokes for different folks.” Lux said as his fins moved so perfectly across the water. The iridescent shine of the water illuminated the scales on his orange body, so perfectly placed and shaped.  

“You got to take a risk to find yours. That saying doesn’t come from no where. You don’t know what you like until you change what you’ve got. Make sense kid?”  

Locking eyes, Coi felt raw. They swam in perfect synchronicity, across the deep blue sea. Everyone is moving together, yet in complete separation.  

Lux was a bit of a mentor, always looking out for the youth and those who seemed lost or alone. Coi had never swam beneath the surface. He stayed atop, high enough to be bathed in the sunlight and see a world that was so close, yet so far away. Lux wanted to help Coi, help him move beyond the surface, into the depths of the oceanic kingdom that was endless and prosperous, where he belonged. Coi had no interest, though that did not deter Lux from trying.

Just as Lux was on this train of thought, Coi blurted “I don’t need your sympathy.”  

“Excuse me?”  

Their swim was directionless now. Like a car riding out of control.  

“I know why you’re here. You’re here because of the reason every other fish has ever taken interest in me.”  

The rest of the sentence seemed to go unspoken. “I love it up here. I wish I could show you how beautiful your scales are in the sun.”  

Lux was still recovering from the pattern interruption.  The script had been compromised.

“Don’t you feel how warm it is up here? How nice it feels to see a world beyond your own?”  

“This makes you an easy target.”  Lux spoke coldly.

“An easy target to what? Nobody wants to eat us.”  

“They want us in their ponds.”  

“Eh, I don’t mind it.”  

“You don’t mind being captive?”  

“No, I don't mind what I can’t control.”  

“You can control it by staying safe, beneath the surface. Staying with others.”  

“I am beneath the surface.”  

Lux was in disbelief. Coi was happy as a lark.  

“Lighten up big guy, the shadows down there are getting to you.”  

This was like being friends with the boogie man. Never has Lux been on the other side. Coi had something no one else had, and that’s what concerned everyone. He was simply a different stroke. Lux felt free, happy, he smiled with his eyes squinting at the sun.  

“Mhm, she’ll do ya good.”  

“How did you end up here in the first place, if you don’t mind me asking?”  

“Sink or swim. That’s what my dad told me. Sink or swim.  

I chose to swim, metaphorically, and literally. It’s what we’re created to do.” 

“And what, all of us are choosing to sink?”  

“Therein lies the problem, that’s not my decisions to make or judgement to pass. I don’t know sir. What are you doing? From the presentation, seems like you think you’re sinking. 

Life down there moves too quickly. It’s dark and it’s isolated, even though everyone is together. Up here, I am free, I am me, and I appreciate what it is I have: life. Life is about risk, and thrills, and mystery.” Coi swam in a circle.  

“Well, we would all really like it if you joined us, participated, contributed.”  

“I don’t fit the mold, so I don’t get a hand to hold. It’s all or nothing down there and I chose nothing... 

Time to turn back.”  

His knowledge of these uncharted seas was amazing to Lux.  

The sun now marinated their scaled back, like a warm hug from behind.  

“Well, I thought I would be leaving and you’d be coming with me, after I helped you. 

Seems to be the other way around.”  

“Huh?”  

“You helped me.”  

“Hmm.” A stoic look came across Coi’s face.  

“Who would have thought? Not I!”  

Laughter erupted.  

“We are the sea, all of it, every piece and every part. We are the sun, and we live by the moon. To be nature means to be all of nature, the beautiful, the comfortable, the scary, and the unpredictable. We get so caught up in our own bubble we forget all the moving parts around us. We forget to celebrate, to be, and to feel. We forget to look up, because we realize that even as big fish, we are still little in the grand scheme,”  

Coi glances down, “Everyone is worried about me, when they’re really worried about themselves. I’m fine up here. I choose to swim.”  

‘Sink or swim” Lux responds.  

“Sink or swim,” Coi responds.  

Just as natural as a wave, the fish swam in two separate directions, to the same places they were before, but never the same fish. 

Small fish in a big pond, or was it big fish in a small pond? Either way, life was never the same.